Ruby is turning 3 on Sunday, you guys! I mean. . . I just. . . what? I think 3 means she is officially not a baby anymore, and that kind of makes me sad. If we're friends on Facebook, you already follow Ruby's every move. You know that she is well on her way to being potty trained; she likes to make bedtime last as long as possible; she says tons of cute things. Ruby's 3rd birthday means that I've been a mom for 3 years -- a single mom for 3 years. That feels crazy.
Earlier today, I posted a picture on Facebook of me holding Ruby when she was just a few days old. A friend of mine mentioned that I probably had a lot of things I wished I go back and say to myself as a brand new mom. So I started thinking of all the things I could tell myself of 3 years ago as a new mom. I'm certainly no veteran, but 3 years in, I think I'm figuring it out (though some days I seriously doubt that). Ruby and I are both alive, so I'm counting that as a victory. Anyway, here are a list of things I'd like to tell that new mom in the picture.
*You just don't even know how awesome being a mom is going to be.
*You will survive middle of the night feedings, poopy diapers, tantrums, potty training, etc., etc., etc.
*It's definitely going to be hard, but overcoming those hard times will show you how strong you really are.
*The good times will make the hard times worth it.
*You're going to go back to school and get a master's degree.
*You're going to buy a house.
*You're going to learn to love and sacrifice in a way you never knew you could.
*You're going to view your own mother in a totally new light.
*You're going to lie awake at night wondering how you can protect your daughter from anything that could hurt her. And then you will try to rest in God's promises.
*You're going to rejoice over the smallest things that your child does.
*You're going to learn more about God's love than you ever did in a lifetime of church.
*You're going to watch God protect and provide for you and your daughter over and over again.
*You're going to be so grateful for family and friends who have supported and encouraged you.
*You're going to watch your daughter take her first step, hear her say her first word, watch in amazement
as she learns new things and be so, so, so grateful that God gave you the courage to keep at it instead of
listening to that tiny voice in your head back in Mexico telling you that you could just make it all go away.
Wow. This post is super sappy. I don't even care. Thinking back to Ruby as a baby makes me sappy.
When I was pregnant and had just returned to the States and was so depressed, my mom used to say "In a few years, things will all look different." She was so right.
Very proud of you Kinsey. When I think about what else could have happened, and what many young (and old) people are doing with their lives, it makes me very happy that you are where you are. All you have done is what you should have done, but that isn't so easy and is not at all very common. As for being sappy, the greatest, most important things people do get referred to as "sappy." If the experiences you have described here are sappy, I hope your life gets more and more sappy. I love you.
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